I know I said I was going to do a review of Amnesia next, but that will have to wait...
I was watching TV, just like any regular lazy procrastination filled night. Than a commercial came on... O but not just any commercial mind you, no no no, this was a movie trailer! What kind of movie trailer you ask? What kind of disturbing monstrosity with 100 eyes, 20 legs, 75 arms, and british looking teeth could it possibly be!?
Well my friends... it seems that the countdown to 2012 (if you believe in that BS) has begun, but if you don't believe in 2012, you may begin to believe..
Get to the point already? What is it? Can it really be that bad? Is it another remake or sequal? A straight to DVD Disney movie?
Ok ok... I won't keep you in suspense any longer......
...
sorry..
The trailer that struck me so hard, that I needed to blog about it instead of writing a legitimate review on something else... was..
The Justin Beiber Movie!!
(pause for effect)
I know... shocking, isn't it? Not only is a movie bad enough.. It's advertised as a "Rags to ritches story". A rag to ritches story? Are you fucking kidding me? The kid was attending school when he was "discovered" at 13 years old for crying out fucking loud! What kind of rags was he in? They must be talking about the dish rag he used for chores, for allowance money, that he clearly doesn't need anymore.. So it should really be called, a Doing dishes to riches story. Right than you can kind of imagine how the movie would play out..
Mom - Justin, do your dishes! Pick up that dish rag and do them!
Justin- NO! I'm going to become a famous tween sensation and make millions of dollars off of cliche crappy pop songs, but little pre-pubescent girls will love it because I'm singing to them and they can relate to my dish washing pain!
Mom - You'll never achieve that goal! You must do dishes in order to get your allowance money, and you need money to get places n life!
Justin - Beiber my balls mom, I'll show you!
Than he somehow becomes famous, and never had to do dishes again... hence the rags to riches..
In all honesty though, it's kind of hard to go from rags to riches in 3 years... especially when your a teenager and you don't have to worry about anything at all, because your mommy and daddy buy everything for you, and drive you everywhere you need to go. I mean, the kid hasn't even gotten old enough to move out of his damn house or even reach puberty for that matter! Maybe if he was like 30 years old now and 10 years ago he lost everything and than became a pop star and became rich. Than there would be an excuse, but you're about 14 years away from that Beiber old boy... or... young.. boy?
Regardless... the majority of the audience that are going to attend this movie are girls under 16, young boys confused about their sexuality, and pedophiles... Someone... will get raped.. I mean, seriously though, Michael Jackson didn't get his own movie until he was dead! DEAD! Not to mention that his reputation wasn't exactly all that great near the end of his life. But there's a lot of material for a movie there! Because he's been a star, pretty much his whole life. There are a lot of artists that have movies now though, and some that are based on other artists. But come on... To have the nerve to even suggest someone have their own movie about their life of a 3 year span, and than have even more nerve to play yourself in that movie? That's just ridiculous. I mean having a 50 cent movie was bad enough, and now this. I guess this is the same kind of idea that happened with Hannah Montana.. or.. Miley Cirus?? whatever her name is. Sooner or later this kid, being all famous and being undisciplined will probably hit the drugs and alcohol eventually and fuck up his image and be all over the news. Personally, I can't fucking wait for that to happen..
In my opinion, I don't think anyone his age should be exposed like that, sure if you have talent I think you should be able to express that and promote it. But not like that, not like a god damn tween posterboy. I think everyone should have a chance, but when they're older.. mature.. and can actually handle the pressure that will come with that kind of fame.
In conclusion... this movie is the first of many events to occur, that will start a chain reaction which brings us to the apocalypse!
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